Freakout time it is, and as they say, “It is what it is.”
The Republicans just can’t seem to play fair, can’t win without cheating, and they’re stacking ALL the courts, so a Jew or anyone else “of color” can’t get a fair trial nohow.
In video gaming, it’s all about fair, but that doesn’t seem to count for much among the very rich, very privileged and very white.
I’m not white — I’m Jewish. Don’t ask how that computes — you’d have to be an ignorant, uneducated and intolerant racist to appreciate it.
I’m not doing anything these days. Just playing games until they get the fucking vote over with — if you want to know what’s going to happen, it’s going to be a total mess regardless of who wins the election.
It will not merely be contested in the courts — there will be battles in the streets. Gird yourself for some all-too-real combat in your hometown and maybe even in your once-pleasant neighborhood.
If you’re in the suburbs, watch out for those plane-loads of black-garbed weirdos — they’ve come fer yer daughter, Chuck. (ref: Beetlejuice)
Hey, it’s time for a rescue, and nobody’s in charge, so I’ll yell it out for all of us:
“Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!” There. That’ll get ‘er done.
Republicans are full of power and money and fame, but they’re real short on fairness.
Big f*ckin’ deal.
I don’t need no fairness, because I finally have a voice.
That’s right, a pyro actually has its very own voice, and so do the other character classes, and you can learn how to turn on a whole passel of in-game voices, so you can yell a muffled “wudda wudda woo” from inside your pyro mask.
There are other great battle-cries, as well.
You’ll have a use for “go go go” and “sentry up ahead”. Of course, they don’t come out like that — more like “bluh blub bluh”, and “hentree uff ahhbbbd” — close enough.
If you hear me saying ANYTHING, look around — there’s bound to be something there. How you get these neat in-character soundbytes activated is not all that easy.
I’ll give you the steps.
- Hit the TAB button, which will bring up a screen.
- Hit “OPTIONS” and you’ll see an option table.
- Scroll down to Voice Menu 1, 2 & 3, and assign “z” “x” and “c” keys to them.
Now you can hit those buttons in-game and bring up the voice menu — merely hit the corresponding number on your keyboard, and your character will speak in its own voice.
Voice Menu 1 —
- MEDIC!
- THANKS
- GO GO GO!
- MOVE UP
- GO LEFT
- GO RIGHT
- YES
- NO
- PASS TO ME!
Voice Menu 2 —
- INCOMING!
- SPY!
- SENTRY AHEAD!
- TELEPORTER HERE
- DISPENSER HERE
- SENTRY HERE
- ACTIVATE UBERCHARGE!
- (MEDIC) UBERCHARGE READY!
- PASS TO ME!
Voice Menu 3 —
- HELP!
- WUDDA WUDDA WOO!
- CHEERS
- JEERS
- POSITIVE
- NEGATIVE
- NICE SHOT
- GOOD JOB
That’s the whole lot, and welcome to them. The ones I find most useful are “Incoming”, “Spy” and “Wudda Wudda Woo”, the battle-cry of the pyro.
If you take a few moments to examine your character, you’ll note that it is wearing stuff and carrying stuff, and you might want to know what that stuff is, and how to change it into other stuff.
We’ll do a workshop on it, because it’s worth several hours of your time and many more hours of my time to get this across to you.
It’s complicated but simple, like your average Sherlock Holmes mystery.
I’ll just take a moment to remind everyone that there’s only one team, and it includes BOTH red and blue to make a game.
If the reds chase all the blues off the map, guess what?
No game.
Stand around for a long, long time with no game, and see how far you get.
See You At The Top!!!
gorby